To do lists.
Decisions.
Worries & fears.

What do you do when things get too much?

The topic of 'overwhelm' came up at an NLP workshop I held a while ago - a common challenge for many striving in society to be the perfect person with the perfect career, relationship, body, health etc.

This image of perfection, portrayed in society as to what everyone 'needs' in order to be happy has its consequences.

It can be great to move forward in life, gently challenging yourself to step outside of your comfort zone and expand your skills.

Though by having too much emphasis on 'needing' more or ‘doing’ more in order to be happy can create even more unhappiness, stress and anxiety.

As well as increased sense of overwhelm at different levels.

Internal Overwhelm:

People can feel overwhelmed on an internal basis - focusing on too many thoughts, worries, fears, regrets, not knowing what decisions to make.

It has become common human nature to regret and worry about past and future events, lack of trust and confidence in self, others and life.

Creating a complex web of worries and fears. Jumping from idea to idea... dancing around every painful memory, as well as possible outcomes and fears about what may happen.

Essentially everything BUT what is happening in the present moment.

One way to reconnect is to mindfully observe what surrounds you in the present moment. Mentally noting... 'chair, table, glass' etc or whatever is in your surroundings can be a quick way to switch off the mental chatter and regain a moment of presence in our life.

External Overwhelm:

People can feel overwhelmed on an external basis - sensory overload when in busy, stimulating situations such big crowds, shopping centres, city centres etc.

Modern day life has changed the way human beings live dramatically. Often being in place of nonstop hustle and bustle, noise and commotion and addiction to technology. Disconnecting from the tranquillity and simplicity of being connected with nature, self and others.

And for those who need their peace and quiet, busy situations can become unbearable.

How I personally dealt with overwhelm:

Being a sensitive person, I used to struggle a lot with external overwhelm. So much so that in the past I experienced extreme anxiety and panic attacks on a daily and weekly basis. Crowed places used to be unbearable.

Whilst there were many things that helped, one simple trick that helped me a lot was shifting my focus to one point only - my thumb and index finger.

By bringing my attention there and noticing the sensation of the tips of these two fingers gently pressing or rubbing against each other dramatically changed my focus.

My breathing slowed and deepened, my muscles relaxed and I felt a lot calmer. This simple action brought me back to the present moment quickly, easily and effectively.

The more times I did it, the more it became what we call an ‘Anchor’ in NLP. A physical stimulus that provoked an emotional response.

It was my cue to return to the breath, body and the present moment, which then brought a deeper sense of calm and wellbeing.

Overwhelm comes when the focus is placed on too much at once, whether be it internally or externally.

The key is to reduce focus to ONE thing only.

Not to run away, or avoid what’s present.

Though to return to a more resourceful state to then deal with whatever is present.

One small physical touch or sensation can help significantly to bring more clarity and calm into your life. Some people use their breath, some use a song, an image or an object as a reminder - find what works for you.

Something to pull you back to the present moment, one small area of focus so you can then see the current situation from a more resourceful perspective.